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Accept, don't fix

hand with rainbow
“Mom, I don’t want my ADHD fixed.” 

We were hanging out in my son’s room before bed, while he got ready for sleep (maddeningly slowly, as usual). It had been a tough day and honestly I just wanted him to be tucked in so I could collapse on the couch downstairs and watch tv and maybe text back a friend (I seem to constantly drop the texting-back-ball). His comment came out of nowhere and stopped me in my tracks.

“Fix? What do you mean, buddy?”

“I like my ADHD. It makes me different. I like how I think.”

“I like how you think too. I don’t want to fix anything about you.”

We don’t talk about “fixing” anyone in our family. We talk about growth, and learning. Strategies and support. Mistakes being okay and necessary.

I still don’t know where his comment came from. But it goes to show that we can never know how all the tiny messages, spoken and unspoken, that our kids receive get interpreted. It was a reminder to be more intentional with my responses to ensure my kids always feel fully accepted and unconditionally loved, just as they are.